Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Rube Goldberg Divorce

I have always been a fan of Rube Goldberg. You can learn more about him and see examples of his work at his official web site at According to Wikepedia, “Reuben Garrett Lucius Goldberg (July 4, 1883 – December 7, 1970) was an American cartoonist, sculptor, author, engineer and inventor. He is best known for a series of popular cartoons depicting complex gadgets that perform simple tasks in indirect, convoluted ways. These devices are now known as Rube Goldberg machines. Goldberg was only married once but one of his characters Boob McNutt married his true love Pearl, then divorced, then married again and divorced again. I don’t think Liz Taylor and Richard Burton did that! I cannot draw cartoons but I have tried to write a Rube Goldberg scenario for a divorce. It follows:

1. Man is watching movie Cleopatra on TV and thinks about Richard Burton and Liz Taylor getting divorce and his Wife walks into the room.

2. Man asks his Wife for a divorce, she faints and scares the cat.

3. The cat run away causing the dog to chase the cat. The cat lands on the CD player and starts the song Divorce my Tammy Wyatt.

4. The dog knocks over the telephone which hits the speed dial on the phone calling the Husband's attorney.

5. The Husband's attorney has caller id and hears Tammy Wynettte singing divorce and promptly prepares the divorce papers, gives the papers to the Sheriff to serve the Wife and bills the Husband.

6. The Sheriff services the Wife who faints again and drops the papers. A bird flys by picks up the papers and flys out the window.

7. The Wife's attorney happens to be sitting on a park bench near by and the bird drops the papers in his lap. The attorney goes back to his office and promptly files an answer, cross complaint, a dislcosure and production motion, schedules a deposition and sends a bill to the Wife.

8. The bills both arrive the same day and both the Husband and Wife faint and do nothing.

9. The court does not hear from either party and by mistake grants the divorce and notify both Husband and Wife

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