Top Reasons People Divorce

I am surprised I have not done this before. In an article in Associated Content on June 1, 2006, Linda M. McCloud says the following are the top reasons people get divorced. See entire article at http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/35097/top_reasons_people_divorce.html Do you agree? Would you include other reasons in the list?

Money.
Infidelity.
Poor communication
Change in priorities. This can be caused by having kids or due to ones job, big things.
Lack of commitment to the marriage.
Sexual problems.
Other reasons that come up frequently, but not as frequently are:
Addictions
Failed expectations of your spouse (believing one is a super hero or that he/she can fix or be everything to or for you)
Physical, emotional or sexual abuse.

As always, you can post any comment about this blog, Divorce Mediation, or Tucson Arizona by following the directions at the right in the green column or at the bottom of this website. Learn more about mediation at http://www.center-divorce-mediation.com/ WM(163) 1/2/10

Google Trends Divorce

Google Trends provides insights into broad search patterns. You input a term and it shows you how much the term has been searched on a given day. I checked divorce and the peak for 2009 was Jon and Kate plus divorce on June 24th. If there is a Tiger Wood’s divorce it will probably top this. For 2009 it was A-Rod’s wife filling for divorce. You can see the graph for 2009 at http://www.google.com/trends?q=divorce&ctab=0&geo=us&geor=all&date=2009&sort=0.
Not surprisingly for the word marriage, gay marriage tops the list for most recent years.
As always, you can post any comment about this blog, Divorce Mediation, or Tucson Arizona by following the directions at the right in the green column or at the bottom of this website. Learn more about mediation at http://www.center-divorce-mediation.com/ WM(162) 12/26/09

Divorce Etiquette

Is divorce Etiquette and oxymoron along with military intelligence? Apparently not. There is even a book called Divorce Etiquette by Monique DeVere. The cover of the book is a little to racy to show here. As usual I Googled it and found divorce360.com which provides help, advice and community for people contemplating, going through or recovering from divorce and the issues around it, including separation, divorce laws, spousal support and emotional issues. Their web site about divorce Etiquette is http://www.divorce360.com/divorce-articles/after-divorce/general/divorce-etiquette-101-what-to-say.aspx?artid=1505. It discusses issues like How do you tell people about your divorce? Should you send "divorce announcements" saying you are no longer married? How do you update your personal information without being rude? We mark marriages, births. We do not mark divorces. Why? Should we have divorce rituals? If so, what should they be? Should friends and family send divorce cards? What about maiden name changes? Should you announce these? What about etiquette for divorce parties in which you're invited and asked to bring a gift, like an engagement party? I am sure there are thousands of more questions? Do you have any questions or even better yet answers?
As always, you can post any comment about this blog, Divorce Mediation, or Tucson Arizona by following the directions at the right in the green column or at the bottom of this website. Learn more about mediation at http://www.center-divorce-mediation.com/ WM(161) 12/19/09

Ron Lieber and Divorce

The New York Times is my favorite newspaper and I read it every day. I have been following the recent articles about divorce by Ron Lieber. The articles give very good practical advice. I recommend that you read them and follow Ron Lieber’s latest articles. You can go to this link to see more about Ron Lieber and his articles.

http://topics.nytimes.com/top/reference/timestopics/people/l/ron_lieber/index.html?scp=1-spot&sq=ron%20lieber&st=cse

The articles I have recently read and their links include the following:

Money Talks to Have Before Marriage
Published: October 23, 2009
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/10/24/your-money/24money.html

Financial Decisions to Make as You Divorce
Divorcing couples often don’t think of all the financial problems that can arrive after the split. Here’s a list of issues to discuss before the paperwork is final.
Published: November 14, 2009
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/11/14/your-money/14money.html

Experienced in Love and Money
Some advice from those with firsthand experience of divorce may help you avoid the financial pitfalls of a split.
Published: November 21, 2009
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/11/21/your-money/21money.html

Bucks: How to Pick a Divorce Lawyer
Readers weigh in on the best way to pick a divorce lawyer.
Published: November 20, 2009
http://bucks.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/11/20/how-to-pick-a-divorce-lawyer/

As always, you can post any comment about this blog, Divorce Mediation, or Tucson Arizona by following the directions at the right in the green column or at the bottom of this website. Learn more about mediation at http://www.center-divorce-mediation.com WM(160) 12/08/09

Divorce Cakes

As promised in a previous blog, I am following up on Divorce Cakes. The following web site says it all. Check it out. http://smaknews.com/Entertain-Me/31-awesome-cakes-to-celebrate-your-divorce/
As always, you can post any comment about this blog, Divorce Mediation, or Tucson Arizona by following the directions at the right in the green column or at the bottom of this website. Learn more about mediation at http://www.center-divorce-mediation.com/ WM(159) 12/1/09

Divorce and Google ABC

As you know, I am a great fan of Google. I was recently doing a search when I noticed something I should have noticed before. I knew Google suggests searches as you type in words but I never paid attention to what happen if you just type in a letter. I started typing in divorce rate and stopped at the r in rate. I then realized I could get the top searches for the letter r. For fun I typed out divorce and then the first letter of Divorce. The following are my results:

D - Decree, Dance, Documents, Definition, Depression, Deposition Questions, During Pregnancy

I - In - Texas, California, Florida, the Bible, Virginia, Georgia, NC, Colorado

V - Virginia, Video, Visitation Schedule, Virginia Process, Vermont Process, Versus - Annulment, Separation, Legal Separation, Dissolution,

O - Online, Ohio, On Children, Oregon, Online Texas, Of Lady X, Or Separation, Oklahoma, Ohio Laws, Online Free

R - Rate, Records, Rate by States, Records Texas, Rate in2008, Recovery, Rate in America 2008, Records in California, Records in Florida, Rate Statistics

C - Care, Court, Costs, Cakes, California, Child Custody, Checklists, Calculator, Counseling, Court Episodes

E - Effects on Children, Entrance Dance, Effects on Children Statistics, Effects, Etiquette , Essay, Emotional Stages, Emotions, Education Class in Utah, Emotional Support

I was particularly interested in following up Divorce Cakes and Divorce Etiquette. I will probably do a future blog on both.

I also just did what came up for divorce and got the following results:

Divorce - Advice, Papers, Statistics, Process, Rate, Records, Law, Lawyers, Care, Court.

I was disappointed that mediation did not come up but if you type in divorce m, it is the first combination that comes up.

As always, you can post any comment about this blog, Divorce Mediation, or Tucson Arizona by following the directions at the right in the green column or at the bottom of this website. Learn more about mediation at http://www.center-divorce-mediation.com/ WM(158) 11/24/09

Divorce and Basic Training

It has been 40 years since I did my basic training at Fort Bragg. I learned many life lessons. Some good some bad. One that I remember is cleaning the barracks each morning. There was a reward if you your platoon did the best job cleaning. The reward was usually being the first platoon when marching so we did not have to eat dust or experience an accordion effect. I remember Gregg Machado polishing the fire extinguisher until it gleamed or trying to control the floor buffer. Very often no matter what we did, we did not win. I am not sure how we found out but we did learn the trick to winning. The drill sergeants would take a grease pencil and put marks in the barracks. If you found and removed the mark you won. If you did not find the mark, no matter how well you cleaned you lost. The lesson for the army, divorce, and life is you must know the rules of the game.
As always, you can post any comment about this blog, Divorce Mediation, or Tucson Arizona by following the directions at the right in the green column or at the bottom of this website. Learn more about mediation at http://www.center-divorce-mediation.com/ WM(157) 11/17/09